Jun
2008
rejected
June 20th, 2008 at 03:03 pm by wRitErsbLock in Thar She Blows!So… someone keeps calling my cell phone, and I keep rejecting the call. Except for earlier, when I accidentally hit “accept” while grabbing the ringing phone out of my purse. When I saw the caller ID, I immediately disconnected the call and silently cursed myself for answering. Of course, the person immediately called back, sensing I had disconnected in error. I’m not sure if there is a voice mail message or not, as I haven’t felt the need to check.
The thing is, this person does not know why I am rejecting their calls. I am too angry with this person — for something they have likely long forgotten they did, but I only just learned about in the past two months — to even inform them about why I’m upset.
But, I don’t have to talk to them. I’m sorry if they feel hurt by my unexplained rejection, but I don’t have to talk to them. I did, however, inform someone we both speak to so that, should my rejection of calls come up in everyday conversation, they could feel free to inform why I’m rejecting the calls. But that person doesn’t have to.
Anyway, their pain was brought upon themselves by inflicting pain upon me and my family (who actually remain in the dark as I choose to keep this pain to myself except for this semi-cryptic post).
It has been forty days since I last spoke to that person. I didn’t want to initiate the call on that day, having just learned of their mean-spirited “thing” that week, but it was a holiday on which you are required by Hallmark and AT&T to make contact, so I called. You’re all smart and can count back forty days to discern who I’m rejecting, if you’re so inclined.
Apparently, I can hold a grudge. And, frankly, this “thing” is a doozey. So much so that I have only spoken of it with two other people: the one who brought it to my attention, and actually, the other one who brought it to my attention a full year ago that I laughed off at the time. But when the second person brought this “thing” to my attention, that was it.
If your actions/words/whatever are unhealthy for me, my husband, and my child, I don’t have to have you in my life. Period. We have tolerated more than our fair share of mean-spiritedness from this habitual offender.
Welcome to Pereiraville! I'm wRitErsbLock; I live in Central Florida. Make yourself comfortable, comment if you want to (you want to), and try not to spill your wine. Enjoy your stay!
Your 2¢
I’m sorry.
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I found your site on technorati and read a few of your other posts. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed to my Google News Reader. Looking forward to reading more from you down the road!
I hear you. My longest grudge lasted for one year. I was so angry I couldn’t look at, talk to or be in the same room with my sis-in-law.
Difficult, since we were -and are now- so close. But she hurt us in a hideous way and for the first time in my life I actually saw RED. Thank goodness that’s over. I had to let the hate go because it was eating me up.
But yeah, I know what you mean. It hurts you, as well.
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Me too. hugs to all of you!
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Amen. Some things go beyond the “sticks and stones” stage, and it’s much worse when it involves or harms other family members. Just don’t let a grudge burn you up to the point that you waste too much energy being pissed off at the offender. Better off telling them to take a hike or FOAD, and walking away yourself. And making sure they stay out of your life.
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I hear what you’re saying about not letting it eat me up. And, really, most of my anger over it has subsided. But this person has a long history of being hateful. Every time I allow myself to forgive the latest and greatest transgression, thinking nothing can top it, it gets topped.
It’s only on my mind today because I have now missed three phone calls from that person, and one yesterday, with each missed call resulting in a voice mail message. So, it’s on my mind.
This is not a person who should so willingly inflict harm, yet continually does so. And since this particular transgression happened so long ago, and it just happened to take many months and maybe over a year before it trickled back to me, I know for a fact if I confront this person, there will be all around denial that the transgression ever took place. But, I have eliminated every other possibility, coupled with the history of hate… it has to be this person.
And I don’t have the energy or desire to fight with this person. Because any confrontation will be a fight. And while the injury deserves a defense, I am not up for this kind of battle. So I’ll avoid it through silence.
Wow I actually thought this might be me but then I remembered that I don’t call you. I am sure everything else applies though.
{{{WB}}}
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Your blog is stupendous! I.love.it! It makes me laugh, makes me think. My longest time I have harbored a grudge is probably five years. I know. I know — get some therapy. However, I have to say, I think I needed to wallow in my anger.
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