We were watching the Olympics last night (when we really needed to be sleeping), and like everyone else, we heart Michael Phelps. This is what it sounded like to watch Michael Phelps race the 400m last night.

TV: The race begins, Michael, of course, immediately pulls into the lead.
Sherlock: Go Michael!
Me: It must be so demoralizing to be everyone else.
TV: And Phelps turns and pulls farther ahead.
S: It looks like he’s exerting no energy at all.
Me: Phelps takes a break for a Coke to give the other contenders a chance.
S: Phelps exits the pool… he walks to the vending machine… he picks… Cheetos! Michael Phelps has chosen Cheetos for his snack while the race continues.
Me: **laughing**
S: And Phelps pulls up a lounge chair to enjoy his snack. And now the rest of the swimmers have completed their first lap.

It continued that way for the duration of the race.

Later…

TV: And that completes Chellsie Memmel’s Olympics.
S: Security sweeps in and escorts Chellsie out of the arena.
Me: If she hurries, she can head over to the cube and try to snatch a few Cheetos from Michael Phelps before he jumps back into the pool to slaughter the rest of the swimmers in that 400m race!

wRitErsbLock